SwitzerlandEveryone knows what the Swiss are like.
Swiss men like to wear tight shorts, white shirts, braces and William Tell caps, usually with feathers in. They spend most of their time up in the mountains, singing as they walk.
They also enjoy yodelling and playing their 12m long Alpine horns. They are ruddy cheeked, fairly rich, and pretty smug because they have so much fresh mountain air and because their trains always run on time.
They survive on a diet of chocolate and holey-cheese. The women are mostly blonde, never grow old, like to help milking the cattle and are usually called Heidi.
They live in wooden huts on the mountainside, and each room has at least one cuckoo clock.
All this is different if the individual happens to be from Zurich. Zurich dwellers are sharp-suited secretive bankers who make their living by hoarding Nazi gold and helping out corrupt politicians and gangsters. The whole country is spotlessly clean and they are obsessed with the environment.
That's the stereotype, let's check out the reality.
In the countryside you can still see people in traditional dress
(the women carrying baskets of flowers), as well as at musical and
cultural events, but on the whole Swiss people do not dress like that any more. Half a point each for the stereotype and political
correctness.
Stereotype 0.5 Political Correctness 0.5
Mountains cover three fifths of Switzerland's area and mountaineering,
skiing and
hiking are major parts of life. Having said that, 68% of Swiss are
urban dwellers. Another draw
Stereotype 1 Political Correctness 1
Yodelling may not be the favourite pastime of your average young
Swiss urbanite, but the Alphorn is very much alive. There are numerous
Alphorn festivals throughout the year. The horn is not really 12m
long though, the longest are only one third of that. Victory for the stereotype
Stereotype 2 Political Correctness 1
Although a lot of people do regard Switzerland rather highly,
it's not fair to say they're smug. A lot of Swiss go abroad to live and work, and you won't find yourself being lectured about how to
run a country all the time. A point for political correctness.
Stereotype 2 Political Correctness 2
100% true. Swiss trains are always on time. Swiss people also
consider it a matter of honour that they pay bills on time, and they usually arrive anywhere fifteen minutes early to make sure they're not late. Maybe the obsession with punctuality is to do with all the cuckoo clocks and watchmakers.
Stereotype 3 Political Correctness 2
The Swiss eat around ten kilos of chocolate per year, which makes them the greatest chocoholics in the world. Enough said. As for cheese, fondue made of melted Emmental, Gruyère, white wine and flour is virtually the national dish. Political Correctness
is in trouble.
Stereotype 4 Political Correctness 2
Swiss Cheese © Jean KuglerIt's true that Swiss women are sometimes blonde and sometimes called Heidi, but it's rare that they're both, and unfortunately
even blonde Heidis do eventually grow old. Some other Swiss girl's names are Barbel, Beata, Gretel and Mitzi. Most Swiss women have
probably never milked a cow, but if that's what flicks your switch
you could always teach them how. A point for political correctness.
Stereotype 4 Political Correctness 3
Cuckoo clocks are not even Swiss. They originated in South West
Germany. And although you'll see a lot of nice wooden buildings
if you go into the Swiss countryside, most Swiss people don't live
in them. The scores are level!
Stereotype 4 Political Correctness 4
Switzerland manages one third of the world's offshore funds, an
incredible 2 trillion US dollars. It is still quite easy to get
hold of a numbered account, and Swiss bankers can go to prison for
revealing information about someone's banking activities to anyone
but a Swiss judge with a warrant. In recent years they have, however,
been returning funds looted by dictators, freezing accounts held by Al Qaeda, and giving the contents of dormant accounts belonging
to Holocaust victims to the victims' descendants. A draw.
Stereotype 4.5 Political Correctness 4.5
It's true that the Swiss like to keep things neat and tidy, but their commitment to the environment puts the rest of the world to
shame. 60% of their energy needs are met by hydroelectric power,
and each year they produce half the amount of waste per head that
Americans do.
Stereotype 5.5 Political Correctness 4.5
So, in the end it's a narrow victory for the stereotype. Swiss people tend to be punctual outdoorsy types with a penchant for cheese and chocolate. Swiss women are not all called Heidi, and Zurich dwellers are not necessarily all hoarding Nazi gold. The Swiss keep musical traditions alive and are doing more than most people to save the planet, but fortunately for visitors, they don't crow about it too much.